What if your biggest obstacle in life isn’t a lack of knowledge, but something else? What if this one attribute is the one thing that can help you truly excel in life? In this episode, I want discuss what I think is the greatest attribute that any person should have who wants improve themselves and how to develop it.
“I’m am neither clever nor especially gifted. I am only very, very curious.” —Albert Einstein
Have you ever been around a young child who constantly asks, “Why?” It starts simple—“Why is the sky blue?”—and quickly escalates to “Why do people lie?” or “Why do we have wars?” At some point, most adults get frustrated and say, “Because that’s just how it is!”
And that’s the moment curiosity starts to die.
Curiosity is often dismissed as childish or impractical, yet it is one of the most powerful tools for self-development. The ability to question, to seek understanding, and to challenge our assumptions is what leads to wisdom. Without curiosity, we stagnate. With it, we grow.
The Stoics, despite their reputation for being serious and reserved, deeply valued curiosity—not in the sense of idle gossip, but as an essential part of wisdom. Marcus Aurelius himself was a lifelong learner, writing:
“If anyone can refute me—show me I’m making a mistake or looking at things from the wrong perspective—I’ll gladly change. It’s the truth I’m after.”
That is curiosity as means of growth. It’s about being open to new perspectives, questioning your own assumptions, and growing as a person.
Now the reason I wanted to do this episode is that last week I was on a local podcast here in Amsterdam, and I was interviewed by my friend Adrian. It turned out really well, not just because of the things I was able to explain about Stoicism and leadership, but because Adrian was really good at asking good questions, and even more importantly, great follow up questions.
And this was something that I really noticed because it’s something that I want to improve in. And I don’t just mean in podcast interviews, but in life. I often work out an answer to something and think that I have it figured out, only find out later that I missed something because I didn’t go deeper. I didn’t ask myself follow up questions.
So let’s get curious about curiosity.
1. Curiosity as the Antidote to Ego
Imagine someone who believes they know everything. They never ask questions, never reconsider their opinions, and never listen to opposing views. That person is trapped—not by others, but by their own certainty.
Curiosity breaks that cycle. It allows us to be humble enough to admit we don’t have all the answers. Epictetus reminds us:
“It is impossible for a man to learn what he thinks he already knows.”
Do you ever think about why Socrates was considered one of the greatest philosophers? Socrates, who was said to be the wisest man in Athens, not because of everything he knew, but because he knew that he knew nothing. He never stopped asking questions, challenging himself and others, and refining his understanding of the world. His curiosity led him to insights that shaped philosophy for centuries.
Practical Application:
- The next time you strongly believe something, challenge yourself: “What if I’m wrong?” Or even better, “What if the opposite was true?”
- Instead of assuming you understand someone’s viewpoint, ask, “What led you to that conclusion?”
- Seek out books or conversations that challenge your current thinking. Doing so allows you to develop a deeper understanding not only of others or the world around, but also yourself.
2. The Role of Curiosity in Overcoming Obstacles
Curiosity doesn’t just help us learn—it helps us survive and adapt. When we hit roadblocks, we often default to frustration or despair. But curiosity turns problems into puzzles.
Example: Thomas Edison and the Lightbulb
Edison didn’t see failure as defeat—he saw it as data. When his experiments failed, he didn’t say, “This is impossible.” Instead, he said, “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”
That is a Stoic mindset in action. Instead of reacting emotionally to setbacks, approach them with curiosity:
- What can I learn from this?
- What are other ways to approach this problem?
- Who can I learn from?
Seneca put it beautifully:
“Difficulties strengthen the mind, as labor does the body.”
Curiosity allows us to view hardships not as barriers, but as teachers. You don’t learn when things are easy. You learn when they are hard. And like I’ve often said on this podcast before: “Win or learn, then you never lose.”
3. Curiosity and Emotional Mastery
One of the most overlooked aspects of curiosity is its role in managing emotions. When we feel anger, sadness, or anxiety, our instinct is to react. But what if, instead of reacting, we became curious about our own emotions?
Example: The “Why” Exercise
The next time you feel frustrated or anxious, pause and ask yourself: Why do I feel this way?
Then, dig deeper:
- Why does this situation bother me?
- What belief do I have that is causing this reaction?
- Is this belief true?
This technique, often used in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), mirrors Stoic practices. Marcus Aurelius constantly analyzed his emotions, writing:
“You have power over your mind—not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.”
When we get curious about our emotions instead of being controlled by them, we develop greater self-awareness and resilience.
4. Lifelong Learning: The Stoic Commitment to Growth
The greatest Stoics were lifelong students. They read, wrote, debated, and refined their views until their last breath.
Marcus Aurelius, despite being emperor, studied philosophy daily. He didn’t assume his position made him wise—he sought out teachers, questioned his own thinking, and even welcomed criticism as a learning tool.
Example: The Japanese Concept of Kaizen
In Japan, there is a concept called Kaizen, meaning continuous improvement. It’s the idea that no matter how good you are at something, you can always refine and improve.
Curiosity is at the heart of this. It asks:
- How can I be better than I was yesterday?
- What new insights can I gain from this experience?
- Who can I learn from today?
Seneca captures this idea when he says:
“As long as you live, keep learning how to live.”
If you’re not actively learning, you’re actively stagnating.
5. Curiosity and Joy: The Key to Lifelong Wonder
Last week’s episode was all about creating joy, and I wanted to bring this around to talking about how curiosity is a key to joy.
Have you ever noticed how children seem to find joy in the simplest things—a cardboard box, a puddle, a butterfly? That’s because they haven’t yet learned to suppress their curiosity. They don’t assume they already know everything. They don’t see the world as mundane or predictable. To them, everything is new, everything is interesting, and everything is worth exploring.
But somewhere along the way, we lose that sense of wonder. We trade curiosity for certainty, and with it, we trade joy for routine. Life becomes a series of checklists and obligations, and we forget that joy isn’t something we find—it’s something we cultivate.
6. Curiosity Reignites Joy
When was the last time you let yourself be truly fascinated by something? Maybe it was a book that challenged your worldview, a new skill that made your brain light up, or a conversation that took an unexpected turn. Joy and curiosity are deeply linked because curiosity keeps us engaged with life.
Marcus Aurelius reminds us:
“Dwell on the beauty of life. Watch the stars, and see yourself running with them.”
That’s curiosity in action. It’s the willingness to stop, notice, and engage with the world as it is—not just as we assume it to be.
Breaking Free from “Been-There-Done-That” Thinking
One of the biggest killers of joy is the idea that we’ve seen it all before. That jaded, “been-there-done-that” attitude is a self-imposed prison. It tells us there’s nothing new to learn, nothing new to feel, and nothing new to discover. But the truth is, the world hasn’t changed—we have. We’ve stopped asking questions.
What if, instead of assuming we already knew everything, we approached life like an explorer? What if we trained ourselves to find fascination in the familiar?
Seneca tells us:
“Begin at once to live, and count each separate day as a separate life.”
That’s the power of curiosity—it allows us to experience life fully, over and over again.
A Simple Practice: The Beginner’s Mind
The Stoics teach us that happiness isn’t about chasing pleasure—it’s about appreciating what’s already here. But appreciation requires awareness, and awareness requires curiosity.
A simple way to bring more joy into your life is to adopt a “beginner’s mind.”
- Next time you eat a meal, slow down. Notice the flavors, the textures, the way it feels to be nourished.
- When you go on a walk, really look at the world. Notice the colors, the sounds, the way the light changes.
- In your conversations, ask better questions. Instead of waiting for your turn to talk, get curious about the person in front of you.
Joy isn’t something that just happens—it’s something you create by being deeply present and endlessly curious. Curiosity is an antidote to boredom. It turns ordinary days into adventures. It transforms struggles into learning experiences. And when we stay curious, we remind ourselves that life, at its core, is something worth being excited about.
7. How to Cultivate Curiosity in Daily Life
Curiosity isn’t just for scholars or philosophers—it’s a tool we can use every day. Here are some simple ways to reignite your curiosity:
1. Ask “Why?” More Often
- If something annoys you, ask: “Why does this bother me?”
- If you fail at something, ask: “What can I learn from this?”
2. Seek Out Different Perspectives
- Read books or articles by people you disagree with.
- Have conversations where you listen to understand, not to reply.
3. Develop a Beginner’s Mindset
- Even if you’re experienced in something, approach it as if you’re a beginner. This was the power that Socrates had. He would put his preconceived ideas to the side and engage as if he was just learning about the topic at hand.
- Challenge yourself to keep learning in areas you think you’ve mastered. Are there new ways to do what your already doing?
4. Experiment and Play
- Try something new just for fun.
- Curiosity thrives when we step out of routine.
5. Keep a Curiosity Journal
- Write down things that made you curious throughout the day.
- Track questions that interest you and actively seek answers.
Conclusion: Be the Seeker, Not the Knower
The world is not black and white. It is messy, complex, and full of wonder. The moment we assume we already know is the moment we stop growing.
The Stoics teach us that the key to wisdom isn’t in knowing all the answers—it’s in asking better questions.
So I’ll leave you with this:
- What’s something you’ve been wrong about before?
- What belief do you hold that you’ve never truly questioned?
- What’s one thing you’re curious about right now?
Go chase those questions. Because a life filled with curiosity is a life well-lived.
As Marcus Aurelius said:
“Look within. Within is the fountain of good, and it will ever bubble up, if you will ever dig.”
Final Thought: What Will You Explore Next?
This week, challenge yourself to embrace curiosity.
- Pick a topic you’ve never explored before.
- Ask someone about their life experience.
- Question one of your long-held beliefs.
Let’s make curiosity a habit, not a lost art. So stay curious my friends. Stay curious.
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Thanks again for listening!